This past month as been completely overwhelming in so many ways. Of course Millie's treatments, that doesn't even have to be said. She is on stronger chemos and has been stuck there since February 7. It's the love that we have been shown that has brought me to my knees. I know that Millie is an inspiration and I know she has been chosen for this fight because she has brought more people together then I even know about. There is something about those twinkling eyes of hers that touch people's hearts. I have to see the good that has surround us or I would get lost and there is so much good to hold onto.
The number one question I get from everyone right now is, Have they found a match? The answer is sort-of. When we met with the bone marrow team to go over what we should expect over the next 6 months they mentioned that they thought Amelia would have hundreds of possible donors. She doesn't. We do however have around 7 unrelated POSSIBLE donors and 4 cord blood donors. I say possible because these matches have come from the bone marrow registry and they are 6 out of 10 matches. Amelia needs a 10 out of 10. When you swab your check and send it in they can only test 6 markers and there are a handful of people in this world that are a 6/6 for Millie. When our insurance approves the doctors to look further into these possible donors we will know more with what we are dealing with. We have been told that normally insurance will approve them looking into about 4 total. At that point they will try to contact the possible matches and have them do a blood test to see if they are a 10/10. If there are none I'm sure the insurance will pay for more tests, but if not, then Brady and I will pay for the other donors to be tested. If there are no 10/10 matches at that point then I don't know what happens. I guess we will have a sit down and talk options; is it safe to wait and hope to find a match, or do we go ahead without a perfect match? I pray we won't have to answer those questions.
Being Millie
Mitoxantrone: The Blue Devil. This is a new drug to us.
Can you believe she was given an iPad by an anonymous person. It has truly saved her from being locked in a single room for 28 days and counting. THANK YOU!
Brady's friend Jesse came to sing to Millie. It was a good day. She played with one of her best buds Cami and then got serenaded all night. Brady said it was the most at peace he had seen her since we arrived at the hospital. She said it made her feel calm all over.
Suddenly the chemo takes over and my little girl becomes someone I don't recognize. The hair is going, her attitude is changing, her skin is grey, and she starts to loss her giggle. That's the hardest part. That giggle comes long and far between.
And suddenly she is a cancer patient. It happened so quickly I almost didn't see it coming. We started this with a seemingly healthy, happy little girl. We know Millie is still in there and no matter what cancer takes away it can't take everything, It is limited.
Cancer Is So Limited
It cannot cripple love.
It cannot shatter hope.
It cannot corrode faith.
It cannot eat away peace.
It cannot destroy confidence.
It cannot shut out memories.
It cannot silence courage.
It cannot invade the soul.
It cannot steal eternal life.
It cannot conquer the spirit.
Cancer is so limited.
Amelia has always been so willing to do what she needs to do to fight cancer, but this time around she is struggling more than she has in the past. She is older, she understands more, and she knows this isn't fair. I do however know that your prayers are helping. Some times I think they are the only thing keeping any of us going. Thank you for them. Thank you.
